Hotter than blue blazes what ever that means....

This has been the Looooongest day ever and doesn't look like it's gonna stop anytime soon it's 9:00 pm and we just got home because in all his infinite wisdom Monkeys football coach planned a scrimmage against another team from a neighboring district....On the first day of school when it is 90+ degrees outside and hotter than Africa. The boys were so sick 2or 3 of them AND the coach from the other team all threw up...I mean COME ON these are 10 and 11 year old boys really I love football and every thing but CRAP...Oh and to add to the splendor that is my life one of the other parents from the team put me on the spot with the can you do me a favor line....You know I just wanted to turn around and take off running...Damn bad ankle I might have made it. So the "favor" was can you take my little poopsie home with you until his grandma gets out of work...Crap...Unable to think of any way to get out of it I said sure what time will she be coming to get him...Oh it won't be later than 8:00pm...K alright it's 9:05 and well HE'S STILL HERE! The poor kid can't even shower cuz well dudes don't borrow other Dudes undies...or so I've been told. On a more positive note Monkey made 2 interceptions at the scrimmage today...WOO HOO! The Momma is proud and exhausted and her foot is starting to throb and she wants her happy pants and she thinks she should stop talking about her self in the 3rd person but she just can't seem to.....Hope your day has been great...No seriously I really mean it! I'm not just being sarcastic....right.

Julie BTW 9:20pm....still here...Grrrr

Crying Game...Bunny Style...

About a year ago we purchased a Mini-Rex bunny from a local discount store...I know I should never ever ever buy pets from unscrupulous dealers... But you weren't there and you didn't have to look at his cute little face...Any hoo we bought the little bugger and they told us he was 6 weeks old and you couldn't tell what sex they were until 8-10 weeks so we patiently waited 2 weeks took him to the vet to be "identified" and were told it was a girl so with the deal the boogers had struck, (Mouse names girl Monkey names boy) The great debate began names were tossed around and eventually we settled on "Lola" and all was well...Until one of the normal Friday visits to the 1st grade class I was working in we had the brilliant idea that Lola would like to meet the pre-school bunny Valentine an absolutely adorable Lop. It looked really good at first they raced they sniffed they jumped and frolicked so sweet it made your teeth hurt, Then with 18 pre-schoolers looking on it happened....Lola mounted Valentine....Whoa what the heck was that....Wait a flippin' second girl's don't do that....Our little girl had balls...Apparently our buns was a late bloomer or the store had lied about his age. This was a new skill once learned needed to be practiced and I was the object of his affection...repeatedly and violently... without being too graphic I could no longer put my hand into his cage to feed him with out some sort of assault. The last straw was when he got decidedly more aggressive with his attentions and left a 3-4 inch gash on my arm...Off to the vet and off with his balls. A short few weeks later after all the pesky testosterone had been expelled we had our sweet buns back. The problem was dude looked like a lady, Mouse got to name her and Monkey was mad and demanded his right to re-name him. We tried rather unsuccessfully to make the transition from Lola to Harry, then Atilla the bun, we even gave Sam a try with no luck his name was Lola...Mr. Lola...I happen to think that Mr. Lola is a nice name and sorta makes him sound like a gay hairdresser. Sadly I can't afford to have anyone with a name that cool cut my hair...Our buns is feeling under the weather and hopefully he get's better quickly, We miss his constant begging for treats and attention.... Get well soon Mr. Lola we Love your furry little A**


*Hope you all have a relaxing and safe Labor day*

Julie

Little Sicko's

While I was getting Monkey ready for Football practice rushing around trying to remember all the stuff that he was destined to forget and send me home for, I managed to do some sort of Jerry Lewis move and fling myself down the front porch stairs...Apparently while I was falling I screamed out Monkeys name and it must have sounded pretty dramatic because it sent all the kiddies scrambling to see what happened. Picture me laying in the driveway unable to move my ankle, in a fair amount of pain when the laughter started...Not me mind you....My children...and a couple of neighbor kids...laughing at their poor crippled Mother while I laid unable to move at the foot of the stairs "get me the phone" I managed to croak through the pain, laughing Mouse goes into the house and brings back the phone and I call Hubby on his cell phone.

Hubby: Hello

Me: *sniff* Can you come home I fell down the stairs and really hurt my ankle..

Hubby: O honey are you O K ?

Me: *crying now* No I can't get up and the kids are laughing...

Hubby: I'll be right there...*giggle*



What kind of perverted sense of humor do these kids have to find their own mother falling down the stairs amusing?? Let me tell ya what kind...Mine that's what! I don't know what it is about someone falling or getting hit in the crotch that makes me dissolve in a fit of uncontrollable laughter. It's just damn funny... till your the one laying at the bottom of the stairs then...Not so much. As far as the ankle goes it is pretty swollen and sore but I'm confident that I'll survive. The great news is I get to go back to work with a bad hoof...nice job on that one right!

Julie